Athlete Mental Health Week

                  Last week was Athlete Mental Health Week. I missed it, but I will try to make up for it today. Athletics has been a part of my life and obviously mental health is a major part of my life.  So, I think it is important to address mental health issues faced by athletes. I have written about athletes and mental health in past posts, but it has been a while. If you are interested check out my previous posts, Mental Health: Loud and Clear at the Olympics, Sports and Mental Health, and  Mental Health on the Injury Report. 

                  Athlete Mental Health Week 2026 was celebrated February 2-8. It is sponsored by Athletes for Hope. According to their website the purpose of Athlete Mental Health Week is to “amplify voices, break stigma, and put mental health first in sport.”  This is the third year Athlete Mental Health Week  has been celebrated. Athletes for Hope brought together organizations and athletes to share real stories and prioritize mental health, 

                  There is a history of mental health being overlooked in sports. So, often athletes are thought of as “tough guys”. They are expected to push through tough times and perform. Unfortunately, a lot of this still exists. Athletes are supposed to be strong. They are supposed to push themselves to the limit. But athletes are human and just like anyone else, they need to be able to care for their mental health.

                  Fortunately, there are many athletes who have stepped up and spoken about mental health and encouraged athletes of all ages to take care of their mental health. I just listen to Kelsey Plum, a guard on the WNBA Los Sparks team. She mentions how her journey has involved ups and downs with her mental health. She offers advice to young athletes. I think it is important for young athletes to hear from college and professional athletes who have dealt with mental health issues. As we listen to athletes share their stories, we are able to see that it is important to take care of our mental health.

                  Many athletes speak about mental health including Simone Biles, Naomi Osaka, Michael Phelps, Kevin Love, and Dak Prescott. Others include Aly Raisman, Noah Lyles, Ronda Rousey, Serena Williams, DeMar DeRozan, and Tyson Fury. The list goes on. If all these athletes are willing to step forward and talk about their mental health, I think it is important that we listen to what they have to say. As they share their experiences, they are breaking down the stigma that surrounds mental health, not just in sports, but in all areas of life. 

                  As I write this, the Superbowl is on in the background. It made wonder if there are NFL players speaking about mental health. I found a list of eight NFL players who have shared their experience with mental health. I’ll share two of them. I mentioned Dak Prescott, who is the Dallas Cowboys quarterback. He has spoken about the distress he experienced as a result of his mother’s death, the COVID -19 pandemic, and his brother’s death by suicide. He shared that he experienced anxiety. When his brother died, Dak realized that he needed to reach out for help; This led him to create the Ask 4 Help campaign in 2021, which is intended to prioritize mental health and stop the epidemic of suicide.

                  AJ Brown is another NFL player who has shared his experience with mental health issues. He shared that he dealt with depression and suicidal thoughts. He has talked about going to therapy. He offered advice to those in emotional pain, “Especially men, get things off your chest. It’s okay to talk to someone. Seek help. You’re not too tough to talk to someone.”

                  Gymnast Simone Biles and tennis player Naomi Osaka both took breaks from major competition to address their mental health. People questioned how they could step away from the Olympics and French open, respectively. These young women knew their mental health was more important than any medal or trophy. Swimmer Michael Phelps has advocated for addressing depression and suicidal thoughts among elite athletes. NBA basketball player, Kevin Love has been vocal about his experiences with panic attacks and depression. Aly Raisman is another gymnast who has spoken openly about mental health as she discussed anxiety and healing from trauma. Noah Lyles, a track and field athlete, advocates for prioritizing mental health in athletics. Ronda Rousey, the MMA star, shared her struggles with depression. The tennis great, Serena Williams has been open about her experience with post-partum depression and burnout. Another basketball player who has been open about his struggles with depression is DeMar Rozan. Boxer Tyson Fury speaks about his struggles with bipolar disorder.

                  These athletes are just a few of the athletes who have spoken about mental health. I think it is becoming more common for athletes to share their experiences as the stigma surrounding mental health is broken down. As they speak, they help further break down that stigma. It is important that young athletes hear their stories. There is a lot of pressure on young athletes. Children are experiencing the pressures of athletic performance at a young age. It used to be we had youth sports, then high school sports, followed by college athletics. Now, youth sports is being replaced by travel teams with a focus on developing high level athletes. Kids are finding a sport and training year-round on travel ball teams. While I can see the value in these opportunities, I question how much pressure is placed on these young athletes. There is so much pressure to succeed, to be the top in their sport. College scholarships are on the line. Are these kids given emotional support? Are they helped with the emotional side of sports? It seems like adults are placing unrealistic expectations on kids. If they are playing their sport year-round, when do they get to just be kids? 

                  Sports play a major role in culture throughout the world. Sports are on a world stage right now with the Winter Olympics. My hope is that athletes are provided with the tools to deal with their emotions. When they struggle with their mental health, athletes of all ages need to be provided with the support they need. As fans we need to remember that athletes are human. They experience ups and downs. Atheltes need to know it is okay to seek help for their mental health. I am grateful to the athletes who have spoken publicly about mental health. I appreciate the athletes who reach out for help. 

                  Athletes are not superhuman. Mental health issues can affect them just the same as it can affect anyone. So, thank you to the athletes who have spoken out. Thank you to those who have listen and continue to support these athletes. 

                  If you are struggling with your mental health, whether you are an athlete or not, I urge you to reach out for help. You can speak to your primary care provider. You can reach out to a mental health care provider. You can call the 988 hotline. There is help available. Reaching out for help is a sign of strength. There is no weakness in saying, “I am not okay.” 

 

 

                  

 

 

Asking for Help with Depression When You Don’t Have the Words

Often, when we are struggling with depression it is hard to ask for help. It can be difficult to find the words to let someone else know we are struggling. Many times, I have struggled to find the words to ask for help. When the depression leaves me in the dark, words often fail me. I find myself unable to explain to someone else the pain I am experiencing. There are times when I cannot even write what I am experiencing in my journal. 

So, what do we do when we do not have the words to ask for help? The pain of depression can mute us. Wanting to ask for help even when we do not have the words is a sign of strength. The first thing to remember is that we do not need the “right” words to reach out for help. Just saying we cannot explain what we are feeling is an important step. We might tell a trusted person or a healthcare provider, “I’m not okay, and I don’t have the words for it.” We might say, “Something’s wrong, and I don’t know how to talk about it.” Another way to let someone know we are struggling is to say, “I’m struggling more than I’m letting on.”  These words are enough to open the door to receiving help.

We do not need to say a lot to communicate that we are struggling with depression. Just letting someone know that we are not okay can be enough. A few simple statements we can make might include:

 

“On a scale of 1-10, I’m a 3 right now.”

“Today is a bad mental health day.”

“I’m functioning, but barely.”

 

                  Even these statements can be difficult to say. That is okay. It takes strength just to try. When communicating our struggle, it is okay to keep it simple. We do not need to tell the whole story. It can help if we have a few of the above sentences ready. Maybe we write a few of these sentences on a page we create in our journal or a note that we keep somewhere we have easy access to. Then when we need help, we can refer to that page or note. We can even read the sentence if we are struggling to get it out. 

                  Another idea is to borrow words from someone else. Maybe we read something that someone else wrote. It might be an article or words from a song.  We might say, “I read/heard something that describes how I feel.” This is a way to explain how we are feeling without having to find our own words. We could also say, “This article/post/video/song sounds like me.” By doing this we are letting someone else know what our struggle feels like. This can open the door to support. 

                  Some of us can get the words out in writing even when we cannot speak the words. We might send a text saying we are having a hard time but do not know how to talk about it. We might write in our journal and then share that page with someone. I have done this at times. Sometimes I share something I have written with my mental health team. This lets them know I need support. Even a simple email to a therapist or doctor saying that we are not okay can lead to the support we need.

                  We do not always need to explain why we need support. I have a friend who knows I struggle with depression. Sometimes it is enough to just tell her I need her to sit or hang with me for a bit. This is enough for her to know I am struggling, and I just need someone with me. I do not need to explain what I am experiencing. Silence might be part of the support at times. We might not have the words, but we just do not want to be alone with our depression. 

                  It is common for those of us living with depression to struggle to find the words to explain what we are experiencing. Depression steals words from us. It robs us of our ability to tell others how we are feeling or what we need. If you are feeling this way, know that you are not alone. Just because the words elude us does not mean our pain is unreal or invalid. Depression is real. Depression is painful. It is important to remember that depression does not always carry with it the words to make sense of it. Even though I write every day, and writing is an important aspect of my healing, there are times when I cannot find the words to explain to someone that I am suffering. In these moments I tend to become quiet and isolate myself. I have learned that even if I can say, “I am not okay,” to someone on my mental health team, it is enough for them to understand that I need support. They can often guide me to find the words to share what I am going through. That explanation does not need to be detailed. We can rely on our mental health providers to support us in these moments.

                  Not everyone has a mental health provider. If this is the case it is important to have a trusted family member or friend to turn to. In our better moments we can share with this person that depression is a part of our lives and that there may be times when we need support and cannot ask for it. Having a plan for these times is good idea. I wrote an article about having a safety plan (Creating a Safety Plan for Times of Suicidal Crisis). This article addresses when the depression is leading to suicidal thoughts, but a plan can also be created for when we are struggling and need support. I think that might be an upcoming post. 

                  One thing that has helped me is being part of a support group. Most of my experience with support groups has come from a cancer support group, but this group assisted me in dealing with the mental health aspects of my cancer battle. When I first went to the group, I did not have the words to say much. I did a lot of listening. Through listening, I learned from how other people were sharing their struggles and needs. Slowly, I became more comfortable talking. Being in a support group helped me find the words to talk to others. If you are interested in joining a mental health support group, I would recommend NAMI Connections support groups. The link can lead to groups throughout the country.

                  There is a simple sentence that is extremely powerful. “I am not okay.” When we struggle to find the words to let a loved one or mental health provider know that our depression is bad and we need help, we can use this sentence. The loved one can guide us to professional support. Our mental health provider can lead us into a conversation that provides a picture of what we are experiencing. They can then provide the proper support.

                  I understand how difficult it can be to talk about our struggle with depression. We fear others may not understand. The words do not come easily. It is okay if all we can do is utter those four simple words, “I am not okay.”  Long explanations are not needed. The important thing is to reach out in whatever we can. “I am not okay,” is a simple but powerful statement. It is a statement that we can use when other words fail us.        

 

 

Depression Doesn’t Always Look Like Sadness: Quiet Signs That Often Go Unnoticed

                  As with anything that has a stigma attached to it, there is a preconceived idea of what depression looks like. It is a complicated illness with many symptoms. Everyone experiences the symptoms in their own way. As someone who has lived with depression for almost 40 years, I can share my picture of what depression is and the signs the I recognize as part of my mental illness. The picture someone else provides might differ. Of course, there are a lot of commonalities. Many of us experience symptoms that others would recognize as depression, but what are the signs that go unnoticed? There are quiet signs of depression that can persist in our lives.

                  In this post I would like to share some of the quiet signs of depression that often go unnoticed. These quiet signs can be broken down into five categories: 1) Emotional and Mental Signs, 2) Physical and Energy Changes, 3) Behavioral and Social Signs, 4) The “Looks Fine” Signs, and 5) Thought Patterns People Miss. As we look at these signs, remember not everyone will experience all these signs. Even experiencing one or two can make life difficult. These symptoms should be taken seriously. 

                  

Emotional and Mental Signs

                  A person with depression might feel flat, empty, or disconnected. This might appear as feeling numb or not experiencing emotions. The world around you feels gray. There is a feeling of detachment. You might feel a heavy stillness. There can be a sense of hopelessness. These are indications that you are experiencing depression.

                  Another emotional and mental sign is constant self-criticism. It can be frequent hard on yourself thoughts. You might lose interest in things you previously enjoyed. While indecisiveness can be normal, when it starts occurring more frequently, it can be a quiet sign of depression. 

 

Physical and Energy Changes

                  People who do not live with depression often think it is just in a person’s head, but depression can affect us physically. Persistent fatigue is a physical symptom. This is a fatigue that does not improve with rest. Youi just feel constantly fatigued. Related to this is sleeping too much or too little. It may seem odd to include these opposites, but how sleep affects a person is different for everyone. Low motivation is another physical sign. It is that feeling that you just cannot do something. You do not have the physical or emotional energy to engage in an activity. Other quiet signs include aces, headaches, and digestive issues without a clear medical cause. Depression can hurt. While depression is a mental illness, many of us experience physical pain.

 

Behavioral and Social Signs

                  Another quiet sign of depression is withdrawing socially. A person might show up for required things like work but turn down social situations. Excuses are made to avoid going out with friends or attending family events. Canceling plans without connecting with others or explaining the reason for the cancelation can be a quiet sign of depression. Depression can result in a person just going through the motions at work or school. There can be a decrease in productivity. There might be a struggle to start tasks even when the person wants to get the task completed. They might take too long to complete simple tasks. The person might hide behind perfectionism or find themselves overcompensating. This can appear with a person working long hours to make up for a lack of focus. The person might push themselves harder than they are able to in order to keep up with at work or school. 

 

The ”Looks Fine” Signs

                  The “Looks Fine” signs occur when a person  presents a façade. The person may smile, joke, or appear functional when inside they are struggling. When I think of this I am reminded of the actor/comedian Robin Williams. He spent his life making others happy and making them laugh, when inside he was struggling. A person who looks fine might be downplaying distress. They might say, “I am just tired.”  They may try to tell themselves “It’s not that bad.” Another looks fine sign is comparing yourself to others. It is that “others have it worse” thought. This invalidates the pain the person is going through and masks their depression. Often, this prevents a person from getting help. The “looks fine” signs are often seen in high-functioning depression. The person can meet responsibilities while inside they feel awful.

 

Thought Patterns People Miss

                  Our thoughts are not seen by others. So, it is easy for many of us to put on a mask and hide our thoughts. That leads some people to miss the quiet signs that they are struggling with depression. Some of these thoughts might be “I should be able to handle this,” “Other people have it worse,” “I’m just lazy,” “I’m just weak,” or “This is just how I am.” These thoughts are quiet signs and easy to ignore or normalize. When we are frequently having thoughts like these, we need to reach out for help. 

 

                  Quiet signs of depression are often missed. A person can deny them in their own mind. Others are not aware that the person is struggling. As a result, the depression worsens. This is why we need to normalize talking about mental health. If we talk openly about these and other signs of depression, we can make it easier to recognize and accept that we are experiencing depression. This will lead to more people receiving help for depression.

                  Many primary care providers give their patients a depression screening when they go in for a physical. This is an important step. I think there is room for improvement here, though. I have taken this screening many times. I know how to answer to hide my depression if I do not want a provider to know I am struggling. Because the depression screening that is commonly used is just simple scale, it is easy to miss the presence of depression. It does not catch the quiet signs. For this reason, I think primary care providers should ask questions about a person’s mental health. I realize that in today’s healthcare system there is little time for this. Providers are expected to push patients through. Sadly, healthcare is now ruled by corporate policies. Healthcare has gone from being about patient care to being about making money. Providers are not able to spend as much time with patients as they want to. This leads to the quiet signs of depression being missed. In reality, even the obvious signs of depression are often missed. 

                  It is important that we understand and recognize all the signs of depression, even the quiet signs. If you recognize any of the signs present in this post in yourself, I urge you to reach out for help. You can talk to your primary care provider, reach out to a mental health professional, or join a support group through NAMI. Of course, the presence of some of these signs does not mean you have a depression disorder, but it can be an indicator. Take the signs seriously. You do not need to wait for the signs to get worse to seek help.

 It can be helpful to name what you are experiencing. You might try journaling or keeping notes about what you are feeling. This allows you to monitor what you are experiencing. It is helpful to use neutral words to describe what you are feeling. The purpose of journaling or taking notes is to collect information that can be useful if you reach a point where you need to seek help or support.

                  When you recognize the quiet signs of depression try to adjust your expectations of yourself. It is okay to do just enough. Try not to place unrealistic expectations on yourself. Just do what you can and let that be enough. 

                  If you are not at a point where you need support from a mental healthcare professional, you might share what you are experiencing with one safe person. You do not need to tell them everything. You might say something like, “I’m not okay, but I don’t know how explain it yet.” 

                  It is important to watch for escalation. Quiet depression can worsen. If you experience a worsening of the quiet signs, you start feeling hopeless or trapped, or you start having thoughts of self-harm, you need to reach out for help right away. 

                  Depression looks differently in everyone. Sometimes our experience varies at different times. This is why we need to talk about depression. We need to normalize having discussions about depression and other mental illnesses. This will help make it normal to seek support. If you are experiencing any of the quiet signs of depression, please do not ignore them. Monitor them and reach out for support.