It is Mental Illness Awareness Week. Yesterday I was reminded just how alive the stigma surrounding mental illness still is. The negative experience I had was in a hospital emergency department with a medical professional. It shocked me, but did not surprise me. We have come a long way with raising awareness, but we still have a long way to go.
I would like to share what happened to me to raise awareness of where the stigma still exists and who we still need to educate. I was in the emergency department of a good hospital. I needed care for something that was not mental health related even though my anxiety was increased. The triage nurse was asking me questions. I watched her facial expressions as I answered her questions about a couple medications I was taking were for. As she heard my answer, depression and anxiety, she had that look that said she did not believe there was another health issue. It is that look that many of us have seen. It wants to blame everything on our mental illness.
Then when I said that I thought I had an anxiety alongside of the health issue that brought me to the ER, I saw the look of dismissiveness on her face. Nothing I could say from that moment on would separate me from my mental illness. Today I was able to read her notes in the hospital’s patient portal. There was nothing written there about why I had gone to the ER. It felt like a mockery of my mental health.
This is a battle I have fought my whole life. As soon as some people find out I have a mental illness, I am judged. It is as if it is somehow my fault that I live with depression and anxiety. I eventually left the emergency room without being treated. My reason for leaving was strongly influenced by knowing the triage nurse had dismissed me as a being there because I had a mental illness, which was something she did not have time for. I knew her notes would influence how soon I would be seen and what the doctor would know and not know going into seeing me.
I am someone who is usually confident in knowing that I am not defined by the mental illness I live with. That does not mean that incidents like this do not hurt me. I think I may just bounce back a little faster than I may have in the past.
My concern now is for others who may not have the same level of confidence I do in this area. What about people who are newly diagnosed? Or people who are struggling? Feeling judged for having an illness is hurtful. It is also unfair. Yet, judgement still happens frequently. If a medical professional, like the triage nurse who should know better, can be judgmental and further push stigma onto someone with mental illness, how can we expect the everyday people we encounter to not judge us?
This is one of the reasons Mental Illness Awareness Week exists. It is why there are organizations such as NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Illness) working so hard to raise awareness and reduce stigma. One effort that anyone can make this week is look up their local NAMI chapter online. Check out what they offer. Maybe you will find something that you can get involved in.
A nurse should know better. Yes, I stated that I was experiencing anxiety, but that nurse should have been supportive rather than judgmental. She should have looked beyond the anxiety and recognize that I was experiencing another significant health issue that needed attention.
I have seen mental illness stigma and ignorance in many places, including the workplace, schools, social settings, families, media coverage, and the government. We should be working to erase this stigma and ignorance. We do that through sharing our stories. We do that through education. We do that through taking action.
Maybe this Mental Illness Awareness Week we can each share one story with others that promotes awareness and understanding. I am not just asking those of us with mental illness to share their stories. It takes a whole community to ignite understanding and reduce stigma. Family and friends can share a positive experience. Mental health professionals can share a positive perception of mental illness. A physical health care professional can share a positive experience they have seen with a patient.
We do not need to share these stories on big stages. It can be enough to tell just a one or two other people. You can share a story in the comments section of this post if you would like.
I understand that not everyone has a platform like I do with this blog. That is why it is important for me to share my experiences here. My blog readership has been increasing. If each of you reading this shared one positive experience or story about mental illness with someone, we would reach hundreds of others. If those people than shared with one person, we would reach even more. You get the idea.
So, maybe having the negative experience I had last night is not all bad. It encouraged me to write this post.
As for my positive story, here goes. I have fought mental illness for almost 40 years. It has tried to beat me down. It has tried to take my life, but I am still here. I am spreading the reality that mental illness does not need to define us. I have met incredible mental health professionals who make a difference in my life and in the lives of others. Along my journey I have met people with mental illness who are truly resilient and who work to help others.
As I end this post, I really hope that triage nurse was just having an off night and that in the future she does not dismiss a patient because of their mental illness. To make this happen we all need to share stories and be a part of the work to end the stigma surrounding mental illness.
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