There are a lot of myths about depression. People who have never lived with depression make assumptions about what it means to have depression. Depression gets boxed into stereotypes that arise from these false ideas or myths. I have decided I will write about these myths in different posts over the next few weeks.
One myth that is widely believed is that depression is just feeling sad. People mistakenly believe that a person can just smile and erase depression. As someone who has lived with depression for close to four decades, I can tell you that depression is not sadness. Let’s look at a couple definitions. Sadness is defined as “the condition or quality of being sad” with sad being defined as “feeling or showing sorrow or being unhappy.” (Oxford Languages). A person might be sad because they miss a friend or a because of a breakup. When a beloved character in a movie dies a person might be sad. A person might be sad when a colleague retires. Sadness is a real emotion, but sadness passes. It is not pervasive.
Depression on the other hand is a medical condition. Depression involves depressed mood and a loss of interest or pleasure. These symptoms cause significant distress or impairment according to the DSM-5. There can be changes in sleep, appetite, energy, and/or concentration. There are often feelings of worthlessness. This is the medical criteria. I am not a psychiatrist. I am a person with lived experience. So, let’s step away from the diagnostic criteria and discuss why depression is so much more than sadness.
Depression often makes me feel numb. At the same time, I experience emotional pain. These may sound like opposites or two things that cannot happen at the same time. This is what makes depression so difficult. We can experience both emotional pain and emotional numbness at the same time. Somehow it hurts to be emotionally numb. I am not sure I can put the feeling into words. Maybe an appropriate image might be the burn of frostbite. Think about something being so cold it burns. That is what it is like to experience the emotional numbness of depression.
There is a heaviness to depression. It is as if a weight is bearing down on me. Every thought seems too much to bear. Usually, the thoughts are negative. These thoughts often run on loop in my head. They make me feel worthless. The thoughts tell me life is not worth living. That is depression.
I struggle to sleep. Depression is exhausting, but again opposites make an appearance. I can be dead tired, and depression will prevent me from sleeping. Sleep disturbances are common with depression. Some people who live with depression sleep too much. Sleeping too much and not being able to sleep are both common in depression. It just depends on how the individual person is affected. Fatigue and loss of energy can also be an issue with depression.
Concentration is often impaired in depression. It can be difficult to focus on activities such as reading or completing a task that requires thinking. As much as I love to read a great novel, there are times when my depression makes it impossible for me to concentrate on the words on the page. Sometimes even the simplest of tasks can seem like a chore. You might not think about the energy it takes to take a shower or even brush your teeth, but when you are living with depression it can be difficult to engage in basic hygiene activities. Again, this is depression.
For some of us depression carries with it a sense of hopelessness. Many things just do not seem worth doing. Even living can seem pointless. This is where suicidal thoughts start to emerge. This is a very difficult part of depression. Imagine not feeling that life was worth living. It is painful, but it is a reality for many of us.
All these symptoms are pervasive meaning they last. They do not disappear after a day or two. Even with treatment some of these symptoms can persist in varying degrees. Thankfully, there are a lot of treatments that are effective and can help those of us living with depression. Living with depression is a battle and we need to stay on top of our treatment plans. That is the only way to fight depression.
I started this post talking about myths surrounding depression. Can you see how the idea that depression is just sadness is a myth? There is so much more to depression than feeling sad or down in the dumps. Let’s try to eliminate this myth. Please do not tell someone who is suffering from depression that they are just sad. Don’t tell them to smile. Don’t tell them they have so much to be happy about. I have been told each of these statements. They do more harm than good. These statements make me feel like I am not doing enough. They make me feel like I am flawed. Depression is an illness, not a flaw. Remember healing depression is not about simply being happy.
No comments:
Post a Comment