Living with an Invisible Illness

            Depression is an invisible illness.  So often, others cannot see the pain and the struggle the sufferer goes through.  There are no physical markers like a cast or cane.  There is no pale or jaundiced skin.  Often, it is hidden behind the façade of a smile.  It is not unusual for a person with depression to look “normal”, to look as if they are functioning just fine.  The truth of the illness is hidden.  It’s pain unknown to others because it is within the mind.  No one sees the debilitating thoughts.  No one sees the weight that drags us down.  The darkness is ours alone.  

            On the outside people with depression can look ordinary.  While inside they are ravaged by an illness that has no mercy.  Often, we can go about our daily activities without anyone knowing.  We lie and say we are tired or that we just need some rest.  The reality is that depression is tearing us apart.  We are living behind a façade.  Alone, the illness hurts, makes us want to scream out in pain.  

            We hide because others don’t understand.  They tell us to smile, tell us to cheer up.  Don’t they know we would if we could?  Others do not believe our illness is real.  They believe that we just need to think positive. Ha!! Would they tell some with high blood pressure to think their pressure was lower?  Would they tell someone with cancer to just think positive? Why then do those of us with depression hear such platitudes from others? 

            Depression is an illness.  Those of us who live with it know its reality.  We cannot just think ourselves well.  Telling us to, only makes the pain worse.  People mean well.  They want us to be happy, but depression is more than being unhappy.  It is an all-consuming condition.  It affects our mood, our thoughts, our physical health.  Depression requires treatment, not just positive words.  One glance at the statistics shows that depression can cause death.  It is not an illness that will get better on its own.  People need to understand the importance of treatment.  People need to understand the severity of the illness.  Stop saying, “Smile, you have so much to be happy about.” Instead, ask us what we need.  Listen to us, really hear what we are saying.  Encourage us to seek treatment.  Don’t make jokes about therapy.  It is a valuable part of healing for us.  Allow us to take days off for our mental health just as we would If we had the flu or a migraine.  

            Depression does not have to be an invisible illness.  With understanding and awareness, we can change things.  We can help people who suffer from depression.  We can let them know their illness is real and that we want them to heal. 

            I would like to share a poem with you that attempts to describe living with this invisible illness:

 

An Invisible Illness

 

I see it in the eyes of others.

They wonder how I can have an illness

When I seem to function so well. 

My illness is invisible at times,

But it is always there.

Plaguing my mind;

Hindering my life.

I hold so much pain inside;

Pretend the physical symptoms are not real.

Mental illness is often silent on the outside.

Others do not understand what I go through each day.

They assume I am okay.

Sometimes I even tell them I am.

It is my attempt to normalize how I feel,

But it is a lie.

Mental illness hurts.

Invisible at first glance.

Devasting when truly seen.

If others could see the torment

Maybe they would understand and

Life might be a little easier for me.

The pain of an invisible illness is hard to explain.

So, I do my best to hide it. 

When really, I should explain to anyone who will listen.

Let others know what it is like.

Raise awareness

And allow myself a chance to heal.

Check back Monday, July 3 for the next post: "Depression: What I Know and What I Don't Know".