Today’s post was written by Stephanie Debnath, PMHNP. She is a psychiatric nurse practitioner who works with TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation). Full disclosure: she has treated me. Today she shares her experience providing TMS treatment. There is a link at the end of the post to the SoCal TMS website for more information. There are also two links to my book, “Traveling the Healing Journey: Finding the Light in Mental Illness”, which includes an explanation of TMS and shares my experience.
Renewed and Recharged
In my 18-year career in Psych Nursing I want to say I’ve seen it all. I’ve seen children with deep emotional disturbances, adults with intense psychological pain, and people of every age battling the extreme loss of quality of life. I’ve watched the recovery of addicts, disordered eating, and multi-faceted psychosis. I’ve seen a lot of lost wars. I’ve worked directly with the refugee, the rich, the poor, the unsheltered, and the celebrity. We all suffer from something. I’ve used my voice, my heart, my brain, and my hands. I’ve applied therapy, medication, electricity, and heavy bandages to try and heal my patients. I felt like I’ve seen it all.
The problem with thinking you’ve seen it all, is that you then assume a conclusion about people, the healthcare system, and the state of psychiatry. You assume you only can use what you have in front of you, or what others before you have used. You assume that the type of response you have gotten is exactly what you will always get. You have no desire to try something else, something new, or something different because, well—you’ve seen it all.
In 2011, I started a new job at SoCal TMS Center to do TMS (Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation). I had no idea what I was getting into, but I knew I didn’t want to stay where I was. On my first day of training, I saw a woman, nearly catatonic. She was being walked into the treatment room by a caregiver and was stiff as a board. She had no life in her. It was difficult to get the treatment started, but we did. That repeated each day. Two weeks later, I saw her coming in again—this time, walking on her own. I asked her name because I didn’t recognize her. She was glamorously put together and had no caregiver. I was confused. How could this be? I saw this with ECT (Electroconvulsive Therapy), but this wasn’t as strong or severe a treatment. I then saw a man who had been in bed for 5 years come alive again. His wife even called me to ask for guidance, as she has never known this version of him in 20 years of marriage. I then saw a nurse who was hospitalized 22 times start doing her laundry, and baking a cake, and taking care of herself. She has not been hospitalized for the last 12 years. I then saw an elderly man who looked like my grandfather crying with relief, “I just wish this was around for me 40 years ago…”. I then saw a mother with postpartum depression able to care for her child again, and a woman with pregnancy psychosis almost abort her child for reasons she couldn’t fathom once she was better. I saw a doctor, and a teacher, and scientist, and an actor. I saw, I saw, I saw. Renewed, recharged.
Day after day, week after week, year after year, I see. Twelve years later, I continue to see new things, new recoveries, new discoveries. It has left me renewed and recharged, too. When someone comes to me for help, I no longer view them through just the lens of my experiences—but through the lens of possibility. Instead of, “this treatment is not meant for that”, I can say, “perhaps, let’s see”. When someone is without hope and they think there is nothing left for them, I can lend them mine. I can honestly say we have not found a magic wand yet, but I am excited to know that I HAVE NOT seen it all.
Stephanie Debnath, PMHNP
Get more information from SoCal TMS:
Learn about TMS in my book:
Thank you for helping my cousin and so many others, Stephanie!
ReplyDeleteWhat a clean thought. “I have not seen it all”. Thank you.
ReplyDelete❤️
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