Are We Alone?

                  “You are not alone. You are seen. I am with you. You are not alone.”

 — Shonda Rhimes

 

Depression is an ugly illness. I know this all too well. When depression wraps its blanketing arms around me, I feel isolated as if I am the only one who experiences this lonely illness. While I know I am not alone, it is difficult to escape the feeling that I am. It is necessary to remind myself that I have support. There are ways for me to reach out for help. 

It takes effort to build a support system. This is not an easy task when we are in the midst of a depressive episode. That is why it is important to lay the foundations of a support system when the depression is not crushing us. Family and friends can be the first layer of a support system. They may notice when we are struggling and offer support. At times they may not notice. It is then that we need to reach out. If we let them know that there are times when we need support and what that support looks like, they will be better able to support us when we are depressed. That support is going to look different for each one of us. Perhaps the support is being there to talk or go for a walk. It might be they need to provide a listening ear. Being able to provide that support cannot happen if they don’t know what we need. We don’t need to share what we need with all our friends and family. It is enough to have just a select few that we feel comfortable with talking about our depression.

What if we don’t have friends or family we can turn to. Some of us are alone or we don’t feel comfortable with the people in our life. This is where support groups can be of value. One group that supports people with depression and other mental illnesses is the 

NAMI Connections Support Group. You can find one in your area by clicking on the link. Support groups bring people with similar experiences together. Being able to speak with others who have had similar experiences is beneficial and can help you through difficult times.

                  If you have a mental health care provider, that person is another support who you can turn to when you need support. Personally, I would be lost without the mental health professionals I see. Talking to a mental health professional is an important aspect of dealing with depression and other mental illnesses. If you do not have access to one, I suggest you see your primary care provider and ask for a referral. There are even mental health providers online now. I have never used one of the online therapy services, but I would guess it would be helpful if you don’t have access to an in-person mental health provider. 

                  Another option is calling 988. You can call this line when you are in crisis as well as when you need someone to talk to. This hotline can provide someone to talk to as well as send crisis personnel if necessary.

                  The title of this post is “Are We Alone?” I think the answer to that question is that while it often feels like we are alone in our depression, we don’t need to be alone. It takes work. We need to communicate with those around us. They need to know how they can help us. We need to know who we can reach out to and where we can find support, whether that be a loved one, a professional, or a support organization. 

                  Depression wants to isolate us. It wants us to feel hopeless. That is part of the illness. It is trying to get us to give up. Our responsibility to remember that we do not need to be alone. Depression is painful. Reaching out is not going to magically make the depression disappear. What it will do is put us on the path to healing. If we are following that path, we are headed in the right direction. Overcoming depression is not easy. Depression is an illness. Treatment is required. Even when we are in treatment there are times when we need extra support. Remember that you can reach out. Depression doesn’t have to isolate us.