Recently, I saw a social media post that said, “Just because you could do more doesn’t mean you’re not doing enough already.” This statement really struck me. I felt it. My guess is that a lot of us can relate to this. It seems there is always a push to do more, but maybe what we really need to do is take a step back and let what are doing be enough.
While this statement likely applies to most people, I think it has even more meaning for those of us living with mental illness. When we are struggling with our mental health, it can be hard to accomplish all we think we need to get done. Our mental illness gets in the way. Tasks become harder to do. We place pressure on ourselves. The pressure than makes it more difficult for us to do things. Then our mental illness grows louder.
When you live with depression there is a heaviness that makes it difficult to be as productive as we might like to be. There is a weight bearing down on us. We try to do things, but our mood prevents us from engaging in activities. We may be able to go through the motions, but we tell ourselves we are not doing enough. Sometimes we can be productive. Many of us living with depression have jobs or go to school. We are out there in the world doing our best to be productive. Still a darkness may hang over us. We might get things done, but it never seems to be enough. When we get trapped into thinking that we are not doing enough, our depression grows louder in our minds. We are unable to recognize what we have done. We feel we haven’t done enough or even that we are not enough. This is part of the cycle of lies that depression tells us.
This feeling of not doing enough also occurs when we live with anxiety. When anxiety controls our thoughts, we worry more about not doing enough. Pressure to accomplish tasks grows. It suffocates us. We tell ourselves that we need to do more. We become anxious about what others will think or say. We might become convinced that we are going to lose our job or that we will fail a class. So, we push ourselves to our breaking point. This might lead to an anxiety attack that leaves us unable to do anything. The pressure we put on ourselves to do more can leave us unable to do anything.
But as the statement above says, we are doing enough. I know it is hard a lesson to learn, but we need to remember that doing what we can is enough. We do not need to push ourselves beyond our limit. Sometimes it is okay to just say, “I have done what I can and that is enough.” I know that is easy to say, but hard to believe. I get it. I struggle with the pressure I put on myself. My last post (April 13th) is an example of letting what I can do be enough. I had a rough weekend and could not write the post I wanted to write for Monday. I beat myself up about it. I told myself I had to write a post. As Sunday neared an end and Monday’s post was not written, I had a choice. I could stay up all night and beat myself up or I could post something simple and let that be good enough. In the end, I chose to let what I could do be enough. I posted a poem I had previously written, but never shared. It did not receive the number of reads I had hoped for, but I posted on schedule.
Was it hard for me to allow myself not to write full post? Yes, it was very hard. Monday, I kept telling myself that I should have written more. That was the voice of my depression and anxiety. These two illnesses were trying to tear me down. While it is hard, I need to recognize the “voices” for what they are. Depression and anxiety feed off telling me I am not enough. I am sure many others can relate to this. We put pressure on ourselves. We question our worth. I am working on telling myself that what I am able to do is enough. I do not need to be perfect. I do not need to push myself beyond my limits. Neither do you. What we can do is enough. It is going to look different on different days. We need to respect ourselves and understand that we are doing the best we can. Living with mental illness is a challenge. Whatever effort we can put forth is worthy. Even if we feel we can do more, we need to remember that what we can do is enough.
This means not comparing ourselves to others. We are all different. We all face different challenges. While it is hard to avoid comparisons, we need to try to give ourselves the grace to be who we are and accept our abilities for what they are. We do what we can. Others do what they can. Let it be enough to do what we can. We need to honor ourselves by recognizing that we do our best and that is enough.
So, remember “Just because you could do more doesn’t mean you’re not doing enough already.”
YESSSSS!
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