How Art Helps Depression and Anxiety: Ways Creativity Can Improve Mental Health

        I never thought of myself as being good at art. I am sure my I was terrible at art as a child. I do not remember having confidence in doing anything art related. My attempts at drawing were criticized. A strange thing has happened as I have learned to search for ways to cope with depression. I discovered art. 

                  As I have found art helping me cope with depression and anxiety, I have wanted to learn more about how art helps and different ways I can engage with art. I thought I would share what I have discovered. Art is a tool and a craft. It can be a passion and a distraction. Art can be anything we want it to be. 

                  Creating art and appreciating the arts can help us cope with depression and anxiety. It is important to note that art does not replace mental health treatment. Art can be a useful coping tool when we are struggling or even to keep us doing well. We can add art making and appreciating art to our mental health toolkits.

How Does Art Help with Depression and Anxiety

There are several ways that art helps with depression. Here are a few:

·      Provides Emotional Expression: Art, in its many forms can help us express our emotions when we cannot find the words. Often, expressing emotions can be difficult when we are struggling with depression or anxiety. Art can provide alternate ways to express emotions. Whether it is drawing, painting, sculpting, writing, music, dance, and other forms of art all invite us to express ourselves. Sometimes art allows us to express emotions that are difficult to express in words. 

·      Reduces Stress in the Moment: When we focus on doing art there is a shift in our attention. We can escape the emotions or stresses we are experiencing because of depression or anxiety. We can escape into a painting projects or lose ourselves in a drawing. The thoughts, worries, or feelings of depression or anxiety do not necessarily disappear, instead they take a backseat to whatever we are creating. 

·      Create a Sense of Accomplishment: When we complete even a small art project, we feel a sense of accomplishment. It might be something as simple as a quick drawing or pouring paint on a canvas. We can see what we have created, and this allows us to feel like we have done something. When our motivation is low, it can help to see ourselves making progress on something. 

·      Encourages Mindfulness: When we are engaging in artistic activities, we pay close attention to colors, sounds, textures, and movement. Focusing on these can interrupt thought patterns that are common with depression and anxiety, such as rumination and negative thought patterns. This is a part of mindfulness.

·      Builds Connections: When we engage in art sometimes, we are drawn to share our art or take art classes. This can reduce isolation. We might go to a Paint Nite or go to the local craft store. We might find enjoyment and connection in going to an art exhibit or a concert. 

·      Helps People Understand Themselves: We may find that we understand aspects of our emotions when we look at our art. We may find patterns that help us understand something about ourselves. We may recognize emotional patterns, personal strengths, or changes in mood that we do not recognize in our day-to-day routines. 

 

Process of Creating

                  Using art to help with mood or anxiety is not about the finished product. It is more about the process. It is about how we feel as we are creating. We might simply create art for the sake of creating it. We can focus on how a particular art medium feels in our hands or what it feels like to doodle on a page. 

                  I have a sketchbook that is just for drawing circles in different patterns when I am feeling anxious or need to calm myself. I focus on drawing the circles in a set pattern. This takes away pressure to have a perfect finished product. 

                  Simple activities such as doodling, taking pictures, molding a piece of clay, or practicing an instrument can be calming and distracting. The practice is the important thing is engaging in an art activity. Let’s look at some simple ways we can engage in the process of creating.

                  Simple Ways to Create

·      Doodling for ten minutes

·      Coloring in a coloring book

·      Make a collage using magazine pictures and stickers

·      Journaling – maybe add some sketches

·      Work with clay or play dough

·      Take photos of things you find interesting

·      Pour paint over a glass jar (there are pouring paints for this)

·      Paint a paint by number canvas

·      Crochet or knit

·      Embroider a small square every day

 

We may need to learn some of these forms of art. That is a good thing. Learning a new skill helps us build confidence and encourages us to engage in something. If there is an art form we would like to learn, we can probably find a video or tutorial on YouTube to guide us. We can also venture out to our local craft store if we are up to it.

No Judgement

You do not have to be great at art to benefit. The process is the important part. We are not looking for masterpieces. We can just enjoy the act of making. As we enjoy the process, we will gain benefits from the art. It can be relaxing, distracting, or just fun. The important thing is not to stress over the art. We want to enjoy what we are making. No one is going to judge our art. We can decide if we share it with others. Our art is for us. 

 

Personal Experience

                  As I mentioned, in my younger years, I did not feel like I was good at art. I avoided most art activities. The exception would be writing, but I did not realize writing was art until much later. 

                  My introduction to art came a few years ago when a friend took me to a Paint Nite. I was not sure I would like it, but I wanted to spend time with my friend. So, we went. I followed the teacher’s instructions. It was fun. At the end of the night, I had a painting I was proud of. Slowly, I started trying painting on my own. Eventually, I discovered paint pouring and fell in love with it. Watching the colors mix soothes me and helps ease the anxiety. Now, I try to find time to paint whenever I can. Sometimes it is hard to motivate myself when I am feeling depressed, but I try. I actually enjoy the practice of art, and I am improving. I am branching out into drawing and coloring. Maybe I will try other art forms. I do not create masterpieces in any way, but I enjoy the practice of making art. I like gifting my art even if my art does not meet masterpiece standards.

                  I recognize the benefits of art in my life. It is now a tool in my coping strategies toolkit. I encourage you to give art a try. You may find that you like it and can add it to your coping strategies toolkit.

 

Depression Recovery: Why Small Victories Matter More Than You Think

Depression is difficult to live with. Depression affects our motivation, our energy levels, our concentration, our decision-making skills, our self-care abilities, and our feelings of accomplishment. With any or all these things being affected by depression, it can be difficult to experience success in the way society tends to view it. For many of us with depression, it is important that we adjust how we define success.

Healing, or recovery, can be difficult to define because they can look different for each person. Healing can even look different for the same person at different times in their life. One thing we need to avoid when we discuss healing is absolutes. Healing does not mean the depressive symptoms are completely gone. Healing is a process. Since it is a process, we need to recognize the small victories in the healing process. 

Why Small Wins Matter in Depression Recovery

                  Small victories are the little things we notice as depression is lifting. A victory might be getting out of bed in the morning. It might be going 24 hours without a suicidal thought. It might be engaging with a friend. Small victories are the steps that show depression is lifting. One way I know I am coming out of a depressive episode is that I see more color in the world around me. Another way I know I am healing is I isolate less. These are small things on their own, but when look at them through the lens of the healing process, they are important. 

                  There have been times when even the small things have seemed impossible for me. When depression is at its worse, I struggle to function. Simple self-care activities are difficult. Keeping my house clean becomes difficult. I set something down and don’t have the willpower to put it where it belongs. Making a meal for myself can be difficult. There have been times when just washing a couple dishes or washing a load of laundry is an accomplishment. It may seem silly to think of one of these activities as a victory, but it shows how difficult depression can make our lives. 

                  I have been lucky that despite depression ravaging my life, I have been able to work most of that time. Many people are not as lucky. There have been days when just walking in the door at work has been a success for me. Unfortunately, I cannot say that depression has not impacted me at work. The days, even the moments when I have been able to function enough to work effectively are successes.

A Simple Exercise to Recognize Your Progress

                  If you are reading this and you live with depression, I want you to try something. Look at your life. Write down five small things that are difficult for you because of depression. There may be more, but let’s start with five. You can add more later. Next to each one, write what it looks like when you accomplish it. Then I want you to write an equal sign (=) after each description. After each description write the word “victory”. Keep this paper where you can easily access it to remind that you can achieve victories. It does not need to be all five at once. Maybe it is just one today and a different one tomorrow. The important thing is recognizing the small victories over depression. 

                  If you are reading this and you do not live with depression, I want you to go back and read that last paragraph. Now, make a list of small things you do without thinking about it. These are your small victories. The difference is these do not require the same effort from you. What if you could not do these things? What if something as seemingly simple as taking a shower was difficult for you? What if returning a text message took effort from you? This is what life with depression is like. 

Small Victories Add Up

                  Small victories add up. They add up at different paces for each of us. We may have setbacks. We made do more on one day than another. We may have days when depression knocks us completely out and we do not do anything. All this is okay. It is part of the healing process. 

I think one of the important parts of healing is recognizing that it is a process. It is actually a lifelong process because depression is an illness. For most of us it is more than just passing episode. I try to remember that there are going to be times when I am doing well and there are going to be times when I struggle. To do this I need to remain focused on the small victories. For example, having a conversation with the techs when I receive TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) or esketamine, is one way I measure my small victories. If I can have a conversation, I know I am improving. I know I am less depressed. 

Depression makes life tough. Those of us who live with it must be tough. We may not recognize how tough we are. That is because depression screams the opposite it in our heads. The truth is we work hard to do the small things. We deserve to recognize these accomplishments. We also need to know that small victories add up. As we do the small things, we increase our ability to do harder things. By focusing on the small things, we can fight our way back into life. We can fight depression and be well. This does not mean we will not fall back into the darkness of depression at times, but if we focus on the small victories, we can keep ourselves on the healing journey. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A Thank You to My Mental Health Team: A Poem About Hope and Healing

Some of my last posts have been heavy. Others have been long. So, today I thought I would share a poem. It is a poem that recognizes the presence of psychologists, psychiatrists, psychiatric nurse practitioners, therapists, and counselors on the journeys so many of us struggle through as we navigate life with mental illness. As I share this poem, I say thank you to my mental health care team. Every one of you makes a difference in my life. I could not get through life without you. I am grateful beyond words. Hopefully, this poem shares that. 

For all the other mental health care professionals reading this, thank you. Your work makes a difference.

 

I Turn to You

 

When life is turned upside down

And everything is in disarray,

I turn to you.

Needing someone to make sense of the madness.

Searching for a reason I feel so much pain.

You quietly reassure me,

Remind me I am not alone.

Just a few words are all it takes.

Your words healing me,

Soothing my aches.

Quieting my mind.

I turn to you,

Know you are there.

I take comfort in your words,

And live to fight another day.

 

 

Self-Care Myths That Can Make Depression Worse (And What Actually Helps)

                  Self-care is something that is frequently talked in relation to mental health. While it is important to engage in self-care, there are some self-care myths that can actually harm our mental health. This is something I had not really given much thought. However, as I have the summer off from work. I am a teacher. So, I get the summers off. I have been hoping to engage in self-care. I am trying to figure out what that looks like. In that search I have discovered that there are self-care myths that we can get trapped in.

                  Usually, self-care is seen in a positive light. What could be bad about putting ourselves first and taking care of ourselves? Focusing on self-care can unintentionally lead to stress or guilt. We can put pressure on ourselves to engage in self-care. We might fear that we are doing it wrong. These are some of the myths. Let’s talk about a few more. 

                  Often, people think of self-care as being relaxing. Think bubble baths and candles. There is more to self-care. It is not always a relaxing activity. Sometimes self-care is taking care of things we need to get done. An example might be scheduling a therapy appointment. Therapy is an important part of healing. The appointments don’t schedule themselves. So, self-care might include taking care of scheduling that appointment. This is not relaxing, but it is part of self-care.

                  Self-care can also include doing the hard things that we need to get done to feel better about ourselves. This might include having a difficult conversation or setting a boundary. Self-care might include doing something that is hard to do because of depression or anxiety. While these do not sound like self-care, they are supporting our long-term well-being. In doing the hard stuff, we allow ourselves to feel better in the long-term. That is self-care. It is not always easy.

                  This leads to another self-care myth. Self-care does not always mean we will feel better immediately. An example is that it might take time to learn how to meditate and feel relief from it. So, while initial attempts at meditation might not make us feel good, with practice we can develop the ability to gain benefits from meditation. The same is true for other common self-care practices. Taking our medication or receiving a treatment is a form of self-care because we are doing what we need to heal. However, medications and treatments can take time to work. Remember just because an activity takes time to work, doesn’t mean it is not working. Self-care is not always a quick fix.

                  Even self-care practices that we normally find relief from can require time to work or may work one day and not the next. An example from my life is that usually writing is a form of self-care for me. There are times, however, when writing overwhelms me. I understand that sometimes I need to step away from a self-care practice for a bit. Maybe I put my pen down for a few hours and try something else. I need to remember that self-care practices do not always work as we expect. It is okay to try different things. Self-care can be about exploration. We can explore different means of self-care and build a bag of self-care activities. Just because something is labeled as self-care that does not ensure that it will always provide relief or be a quick fix.

                  A myth that sometimes pops up is that self-care looks the same for everyone. This simply is not true. What works for one person may not work for someone else. We can try different things. There are a lot of factors that go into choosing the right self-care activity. Factors can be affected by interests, cultural values, personality, finances, health, and many other things. We can all build our own self-care practice using what works for us. We are all unique individuals. As such, we can each define what self-care looks like for us.

                  Another myth is that if a self-care activity isn’t working, we are doing it wrong. Sometimes our mental illness can impact how certain activities work for us. We also need to remember that we need mental health treatment in addition to the self-care activities. Self-care activities are not intended to replace or be instead of mental healthcare treatment. Self-care should be an add-on to treatment. 

                  Along with this, we need to remember that self-care is more than positive thinking. How many of us have been told to “just think positive”? I hate that. Positive thinking can be helpful as we battle mental illness, but it is not enough. Positive thinking does not make mental illness magically disappear. So, it is a myth that positive thinking Is a self-care practice that can alleviate depression or other mental illnesses.

            Self-care is about making choices that benefit our well-being. It is about engaging in practices that make us feel better even if there is a delayed effect. Self-care is truly personal. What works for one person may not work for someone else. We need to find what works for us. We do not need to believe what others tell us about self-care or aspire to have the same experience someone else has with a type of self-care. Bubble baths and candles might work for the social media influencer, but that does not mean we need to enjoy a candlelit bubble bath. 

Our goal with self-care is to be able to care for ourselves on the good days and the bad ones. Our self-care is going to be unique to each of us. Don’t believe the myths or the hype surrounding self-care. We each can find what works for us. We must accept that this can take time and work. Talk to your mental healthcare provider about what self-care might look like for you. Ask for ideas. They know you and can make suggestions. They can also help you process your ideas for self-care. At the end of the day, self-care is what we make of it. Self-care is unique to us, and we need to be patient enough to give our chosen activities time to have an effect.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How to Show Up When You Have Depression (Even When You Don't Feel Like It)

When you live with depression it can be hard to show up in the ways we might want to show up. It is not that we do not want to be fully present or participate some moments. There are times when we just cannot. Depression, anxiety, and other mental illnesses can overtake our desire to be a part of moments or to do things. 

                  Let me explain a little. There are times when depression can make us feel drained or even dead inside. We might be holding pain that we fear will pour out of us if we engage with others. Anxiety can put us on an edge and make us feel like we are going to dive right off it. These feelings are hard to cope with when we are just sitting in our homes. Can you imagine trying to engage with others at these times? 

                  There are times when we do it. Times when can put our mental illness on the backburner, so to speak. It is by no means easy. Nothing is when you live with mental illness. So, how do we do it? How do we show up when we do not have it in us to show up? 

                  Let’s look at some ways to make showing up a bit more doable. First, we should focus on making our involvement smaller. We can be present in less demanding ways. We can prepare ourselves for the involvement. 

                  Here are some things we can try:

·      Redefine what involvement means: We do not need to be fully involved in everything. Maybe instead of being at an event or commitment for the full time, we set a goal of saying for a quarter of the time or half the time depending on what we can do. If it is something we are trying to do for ourselves like clean our house, maybe we commit to washing three dishes or vacuuming one room. If it is going out with friends, maybe we commit to only an hour or two rather than the whole evening.

·      Choose one priority: If we have more than one commitment, choose one to make a priority. Let others know what we are committing to do and be sure to make it known that we will only do what we can.

·      Let others help: If there is someone we can trust involved, we can let them know what we think we handle. Ask them to help us stick to that. We can say something like, “I am having a hard time today. I may need a little help with X or Y?” 

·      Check In Support: If we are going to be out somewhere and think we might have difficulty getting away, we can ask someone ahead of time to give us a call to check in and give us an out. We can also ask someone who is with us to suggest leaving at a set time to help us be able to leave before we become overwhelmed.

·      Prepare in advance: If we know we have something to show up for we can take a few steps to prepare that will make showing up easier. This can range from laying out our clothes the night before to checking out a location in advance. There are many ways we can prepare for things in advance. These are as varied as the activities we show up for. 

     It is important to remember that part of showing up is taking care of ourselves. We cannot show up if we are not taking care of ourselves. This is why being in tune with our mental health is important. To be in tune with our mental health we need to keep appointments with mental health providers. We need to take our medications and receive our treatments. We need to practice our coping skills. We need to ensure we are getting rest and exercise. Basically, we need to take responsibility for our mental health. This is tricky because doing this involves showing up. So, to show up we need to show up. Does that make sense? What I am trying to say is showing up takes making an effort to care for ourselves. We may not always feel like doing this, but if we can just put a little effort into it, only as much as we can give, we can show up.

The thing about showing up is that we are allowed to define what showing up means for us. No one else gets to define it for us. This may sound easier than it is. I know I struggle with showing up and often need reminders. Sometimes I can remind myself. Sometimes I need reminders from my mental healthcare team or others who are close to me. Perhaps, that is the key. We need to have conversations with those who support us. They need to know what we feel we can show up for and how we are able to show up. Of course, our ability to show up is going to vary based on how we are doing. Building a support system is crucial to being able to show up however we can.

Remember mental illness does not need to prevent us from showing up. We need to define what showing up means and then take the steps that will help us show up in our own way.

How to Cope with Depression and Anxiety: 5 Practical Strategies That Help Me Every Day

                  The third anniversary of this blog just passed on June 16. I missed it. Let’s look forward, though. With depression we absolutely need to look forward. I have shared different ideas for dealing with depression. We need to remember that there are always things we can try to ease our depression. Today, I am going to share a few things I am trying to help with my depression and anxiety. Often, both depression and anxiety hit me at the same time. So, some of my strategies help me with both. 

Interrupting the Depression Loop with a Playlist

                  Listening to music can help break the negative loop depression goes on. Many of us with depression experience negative thoughts or ideas running through our minds. It may seem like these thoughts are on a loop because they happen so frequently. I find that if I focus on lyrics when listening to music, I can interrupt the depression loop or anxiety spiral.  What the lyrics are saying is not as important as just syncing into those lyrics, although there are some great lyrics out there to connect to. I try to learn the lyrics of songs I like. Even if it is only for the brief moments the song is playing, I can distract myself with the lyrics. 

                  I have several playlists on my phone. They are for different moods and meet different needs. Creating the playlists is another way of disrupting the depression loop or stopping the anxiety spiral. Deciding on music that meets certain needs or helps certain moods can help us find hope in addition to the distraction. Let me give you an example of a mood lifting playlist. A few years ago, I worked at a school where the environment was contributing heavily to my depression and anxiety. I created a “Morning Work Drive” playlist. The songs played long enough to fill my commute. The lyrics of these songs spoke to me, and they were all by some of my favorite musicians. This playlist gave my mood a boost before I arrived at work, which helped with my mood once I was there. In all honesty, I still had to leave that position at the end of the school year, but the playlist helped me reach the end.

                  If music is something you find comforting or soothing, try making playlists and tuning into the lyrics of your favorite songs. Those lyrics might be able to replace that depression loop or anxiety spiral.

 

Walking and Noticing

                  Walking is known to help improve mood. There is a lot of research out there about this. Rather than go through the research I will just share my experience. 

Walking is the exercise I lean into. I used to walk by myself. I would often combine listening to music with my walks. Being alone and just walking without purpose helped me. Somehow it cleared my head. Some days it worked better than others. That is something to remember with anything you try to ease depression and/or anxiety. Some days they work better than others. 

                  Now, I walk with my dog. Getting a dog and having to walk her has given me a way to escape from my thoughts. I try to follow what my dog is doing. Like all dogs she stops to sniff. I try to follow her lead. No, I do not sniff, but I do stop and notice my surroundings. I try to notice what I see, smell, and hear. As I am noticing my surroundings, I am taking my mind away from the depression loop or the anxiety spiral. I try to name what I am noticing. That gets my mind using words other than what depression and anxiety want me to hear. It is an interruption. That interruption is important. When there is an interruption in the depression loop or anxiety spiral, it keeps them from pulling us in. 

                  I find that if I walk at a good pace in between the stops to notice (and for my dog to sniff), I get my heart rate up. This makes me feel better physically. Depression causes a feeling of being physically drained and heavy. Noticing as I walk makes me feel a little lighter. When I feel better physically, I can let my mind relax. That sounds easier than it is. One walk is not going to change things. It is the practice of committing to walking that makes the difference. You do not need a dog. Just get out there and take a few steps. Maybe the first walk is only five minutes or just to the corner. That is okay. Just get out there and walk. 

 

Journaling

                  I share a lot about how writing helps me heal. It is a major part of how I cope with depression and anxiety that barrels down on me. Journaling is only one form of writing I use. With journaling I tend to write whatever I am feeling or thinking in the moment I have my pen poised over my journal. I use journaling to brain dump. Is that a legitimate term? I do not know, but I am going to use it because it aptly describes what I am doing. I am letting everything flow out of me. I journal to free my mind. I journal to process the thoughts and feelings in my head. My journal gives me a space to store everything. Once my words are stored in my journals, I can choose if or when I go back and reread them. Rereading can be a form of processing. It can also allow us to see where we have come from. 

                  Other times when I use prompts that I find online or in books. Prompts can help guide our writing, which can prevent us from getting stuck on a specific idea. This can be important if we have been journaling about something painful and need a break. Trust your gut as to whether you should be writing whatever you need to get out of your head or whether you need the distraction of a prompt. 

 

Meditative Drawing

                  Again, I am using a term that I made up for something I am doing. I did not look up whether this is a real thing or if this term is already in use. For me meditative drawing started from two conversations with mental health professionals. First, my psychologist mentioned I could try drawing when I did not want to deal with words. It was an alternative to journaling. I quickly bought a sketchbook, drawing pencils, and ink pens. The problem was I knew I was not good at drawing. So, the sketchbook and drawing implements sat untouched even though I meant to give it a try and kept telling myself I would.

                  Then the psychiatric nurse practitioner who leads my TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) treatment suggested I try creating a pattern that I drew repeatedly when I was struggling with depression or anxiety. She suggested using circles. Somehow that made drawing seem easier. I pulled out the sketchbook and have been drawing simple designs, mostly variations of the same one. I use different colors to express different emotions or feelings. I always title the drawing at the bottom. The title reflects whatever I was thinking or the purpose the drawing was meant to serve. 

                  Drawing circles helps me. It slows my anxious thoughts, and it quiets my depressive thoughts. I do not know how this is working. I can just tell you that it is working. I am benefiting from drawing. 

 

Breathing

                  Breathing practice is something I struggle with, but I wanted to include here because I am trying it. I know it benefits many people. I am confident that if I keep it simple, I will improve at using breathing practices. 

                  Breathing practice helps us relax when we are agitated or anxious. This happens when the breathing practice slows our heart rate down. Breathing practices can help us bring our focus to something when we are struggling with depression. It does this by shifting our focus within in our brain by decreasing activity in certain areas of the brain and increasing it in others.

                  There are many ways to focus on our breathing. I think the simplest way might be inhaling for a count of four and then exhaling for a count of eight. 

Let’s take a quick look at a few breathing practices:

·      Box Breathing (also known as the 4-4-4-4 Technique)

o   Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds

This can help calm acute panic, lower immediate stress, and sharpen focus.

 

·      Diaphragmatic Breathing 

o   Focus on deeply breathing into the stomach instead of the chest. 

This type of breathing can reduce physical tension and stabilize our baseline mood.

 

·      4-7-8 Breathing

o   Inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 7 seconds, exhale forcefully for 8 seconds

This can help manage anxiety, stop racing thoughts, and can help us fall asleep faster.

 

·      Physiological Sigh

o   Two quick inhales through the nose followed by one long exhale through the mouth

This can stop stress. It also lowers heart rate.

 

·      Alternate Nostril Breathing (also known as Nadi Shodhana)

o   When breathing alternate blocking one nostril at a time during inhalations and exhalations. 

This can help balance the nervous system. It also reduces mental clutter and eases mild depression.

 

Final Thoughts

                  Living with depression, anxiety, or other mental illness is not easy. In addition to the work we do with our mental health care professional, medication, therapy, and treatment, we need to find ways that we can manage our mental health. We need to engage in practices that help us live with our illness. We cannot leave all our healing up to our mental health care professionals. They are important in treating us and supporting us, but we share in the work to bring healing. In this post I have shared some ways we can improve our mental health. The practices are meant to bring some relief. They are meant provide support. They are not meant to cure us or replace our treatment. These practices help us become active in our own healing. I caution that there will be ups and downs. Still, I encourage you to try whatever strikes you as something you would be able to do or would like to do. 

                  When we live with mental illness, we need to be willing to work on our mental health. We need to be willing to give things a try. We need to be active in trying to heal. 

 

 

 

 

 

How to Find Things to Look Forward to When You Have Depression: Small Steps That Build Hope

                  When you live with mental illness life is often very closed off. We isolate for various reasons. Sometimes it is because we do not feel up to engaging in activities. Sometimes people are so used to us canceling plans that they stop inviting us. Often, we mentally and physically cannot do things. Despite this we cannot give up. We need to engage.

                  In my last post How to Find Joy in the Little Things When You Live with Depression: Simple ways to notice hope, comfort, and small moments of happiness during difficult days I discussed finding joy in moments. Today, I would like to talk about the looking forward. There is a little mental health pick me up trick that can help improve our mood. Simply put, this pick me up is having something to look forward to. Sounds simple, right?. It probably is simpler than we think, but maybe we need a little help figuring out how we can focus on having something to look forward to each day. 

                  One of the reasons we need things to look forward to is that our minds need to know that there is more to life than being in survival mode. There is more to life than the darkness that depression throws on us. Having something to look forward to can break the grip depression or other mental illnesses have on us. Having something to look forward to tells us “Hey, you have this positive coming up!” 

                  Before I jump into ways to set up things to look forward to/things to anticipate, I would like to say that I think it is important to balance what we look forward to with noticing what we have already experienced. Those little joys that I discussed in my last post are equally as important as having something to anticipate. Living with mental illness is hard. Balancing these two is not easy. I recommend the balance because if we are caught up in only thinking about what has happened, we can miss what can happen. By the same token if we are always anticipating and not doing, we have no memories to make. Life, in general, requires balance. So, I just encourage all of us to balance what we anticipate with the joys we notice.

 

 

How do we gather things to anticipate?

                  Here are a few ideas that can help us start anticipating things that will bring us joy even as we battle depression:

    Create Little Things: When we are looking at the future it is often easier to keep things small. We can get lost in the big goals. So, let’s start by creating a “Little Things” List. This can include things like:

o   Going for a walk tomorrow morning

o   Meeting a friend for lunch

o   Watching the season finale of a favorite television show

o   Picking up our favorite coffee on our way to work

o   Carving out time for reading a book by a favorite author or in a favorite genre

    Be Intentional in Our Anticipation: We can allow anticipation to be part of our experience. We might 

o   Read reviews of a movie we plan to see

o   Check out the menu of a restaurant we plan to eat at

o   Watch a YouTube video about a place we plan to visit

o   Talk to a friend about something we plan to do together.

    Decrease the Effort Needed to Say Yes to Something: Enjoyable activities often require a bit of effort. I am talking about the little things that people who do not live with depression might not think about. Here are some examples:

o   Lay our clothes out the night before we plan to do something. This can take the planning and decision making out of preparation.

o   Keep the book we want to read next to our reading spot.

o   Have the friend or family member we are doing something with pick us up.

o   Create a hobby space. This will make it easier to engage in a hobby.

    Create a Future Interest List: Sometimes we do not do things or anticipate something because we do not know what we want to do. Maybe our mind gets overwhelmed when we try to think about what we want to do. Having a list of activities we are interested in doing, allows us to “pick one off the list” and plan it. These lists help up find things to do without being overwhelmed trying to think of something from scratch. We might have a set of lists. Including:

o   Movies we want to watch

o   Restaurants we want to eat at

o   Areas we want to walk in

o   Books we want to read

o   Places we want to visit

o   Hobbies we would like to try

    Set Up Recurring Events: Sometimes it helps if we have a few things that we do every week or at set times. Recurring events take the process of thinking of new things out of process. The predictability also makes things easier when we live with depression. Our mind does not have the added pressure of deciding what to do. Examples of recurring ideas include:

o    A set time to talk to a friend

o   A daily walk with our pet time

o   A set night to go to a restaurant or pick up food

o   A monthly movie day

o   A regular day or two to get coffee from our favorite coffee shop

 

        All of the above show how important structure can be for us. When we can plan things in advance, we are more likely to engage. Notice that most of these things are smaller things. It is important to have these small things to look forward to. It is easier to follow through on small things. When we plan something that we know we are likely to follow through on, our brains are more likely to help us follow through. This develops hope because our brains start to learn that we follow through on doing the small, planned things. Doing these activities allows us to feel joy. 

                  Going back to my previous post (mentioned above), we can “keep evidence” of what we have done, especially if we enjoyed it. Maybe we do this by keeping a list on our phone of the things we have done. We might write about what we have done in a journal. We can keep evidence without words by taking pictures. We might set up a folder on our phone to keep pictures of the things we have engaged in. Whatever way we keep evidence, the important thing is that we have a way to remember that we can engage, and we have engaged. We can look back on this evidence when we are struggling. Seeing our evidence can provide the little push we need to re-engage. 

                  Living with depression often leads us to isolate. This isolation is not healthy mentally or physically. We need to find ways to engage in life. If you do not have anyone to engage in activities with or you just need a little help, I would suggest finding a NAMI Connections support group. Click on the link to find a group near you. Once we start engaging, we will find ourselves doing more. We just need to take one step at a time. We just need one thing to look forward to.